you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
