How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
