Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
How external is "for external use only"?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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