She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
