I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Randomize
