why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
