it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
