u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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