I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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