Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
