you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
