so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
he was CRYING into my vagina
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize