Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Fuck appropriateness.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
