Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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