Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
