We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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