We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Actions speak louder than pants.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
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