Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
