You smell like a Billy Joel song
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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