Girls should come with a carfax report
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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