he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
