I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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