u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
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