come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
