Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
false alarm, still single
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