i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Randomize
