would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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