OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize