does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
