i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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