You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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