was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
