I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Randomize
