Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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