miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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