ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
