Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
