Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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