how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
