Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize