so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
