guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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