You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
he thought i was a dude.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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