Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
