Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
