i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
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