Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
