I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
