Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
