I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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