when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Non-Jews are for practice
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Randomize
